Casey J. Cornelius (00:03):
Hey everyone. And welcome to the latest episode of the four college for life podcast. My name is Casey Cornelius. I’m the founder and president for college for life. And I have the distinct pleasure of getting to interview our speakers, our consultants, the people who make for college for life, what it is. And we have just been thrilled at the outpouring of support and interest in the episodes that we are putting into the world. Thank you so much for those who’ve taken the time to do all the things you’re supposed to do with podcasts, you know, like, and share and subscribe and leave reviews and all the other kind of stuff. You have been able to find us, I hope on all of your favorite platforms, but if not, please let us know today. I is gonna be a lot of fun for me, cuz I get to interview someone who I’m not alone in saying this, but I just admire so much.
Casey J. Cornelius (00:56):
And I think for those who have had the opportunity to get to know this person they, they share in that admiration as well. Before I bring her to the mic. Lemme tell you a little bit about Mindy Sopher. She has been a professional advisor and mentor to students in Ohio, Tennessee, Virginia, and North Carolina. Currently at NC state university. She teaches nonprofit leadership and development and public speaking and advises communication majors, Mindy notes that she’s received some amazing honors, but muses and still dreams of having an elementary school basketball team named the Sopher gophers. If anybody can make that happen, we sure would love it. Let me give you some fun facts about Mindy. These are kind of jaw dropping in a way among other things. She has three times been named the outstanding faculty in the communication department at NC state university.
Casey J. Cornelius (01:44):
She has received the association of fraternity advisors, distinguished service award and the Robert H Schaeffer award for lifetime achievement. She’s had a graduate scholarship in her name created by Kappa Delta sorority and given to women entering the field of higher education. She’s been named the national Greek advisor of the year by Sigma Nu fraternity. She has had a quote, little crystal cup in quote name for her and given to the outstanding NC state sorority every year at homecoming. If you live in Raleigh, North Carolina, you may know that November 20th is Mindy Sofer day as proclaimed by the mayor. She has received the governor of North Carolina’s highest award known as the order of the longleaf pine. Yeah, I’m not making any of these up on a more personal note though in her free time. Mindy raises English bulldogs, enjoys gardening and therapeutic coloring and learning something new every day. Most importantly though says Mindy. She is blessed to have survived cancer five times and is still going strong. So with that great, great bio <laugh> in place. Let me go ahead and bring Mindy Sofer to the mic. Mindy. Did I get all that stuff, right?
Mindy Sopher (02:59):
Oh yes. And I’m still alive.
Casey J. Cornelius (03:02):
Yes you are.
Mindy Sopher (03:03):
Yes I am. Yes you’re I’m gladed. Thank you very much. It just, it means I’m seasoned. I think that’s what drew Smith told me when he asked me to apply for this job at NC state, he said, we need somebody seasoned. I said, that’s the nicest way to say that I’m really old. <Laugh>
Casey J. Cornelius (03:21):
You know, I know that you make jokes about this, but let’s clear something up from the beginning, right? Yes, sir. Uhhuh <affirmative> there is, there is seasoning and then there is a laundry list of accolades as well, right? Like one can be seasoned without accolades, you know, not everybody’s like, oh, I’ve got the order of the long leaf pine on my river. I’ve got a name. I’ve got a day in, in, in my, my hometown named after me. Like those things. Does it, does it ever, you ever pinch yourself and go like, wow, every day, all this stuff is real.
Mindy Sopher (03:53):
Every day I do. The nominations for those came from my students and my colleagues and I aspire to be the person that they think I am. I really do. I work on that every single day to earn the respect and what all good things that they said that I’ve done. So my that’s my role and my goal. I, I still do pinch myself. Yes. Every day when I wake up, my name’s not in the obituaries. Ah, yes. It’s a challenge and an opportunity to do more. Thank you very much for your,
Casey J. Cornelius (04:31):
I love it. You know, I, I think some of that perspective is probably earned a as, as I referenced in the intro to surviving cancer five times. Yeah. What, what have you learned from that? What can you share from, from that process?
Mindy Sopher (04:49):
I, I will be honest with you when I say when a doctor first told me that I had breast cancer, I did not thank him and say, oh great. What an opportunity to learn and grow
Casey J. Cornelius (05:00):
<Laugh> right, right.
Mindy Sopher (05:01):
I was, I was not that excited about it to say the least, but cancer runs in my family. So it wasn’t anything that was a total shock to me. But I will tell you that because I took it as an opportunity to learn. I would say that my strength comes from my faith, the faith that people put in me, the amazing healthcare professionals that I was able to afford. Thanks to my insurance. I have to say really great people who cared for my body, my mind and my spirit too. And from the people I was able to surround myself with who really kept me going. And I mean, I credit my students and the staff here and the family I’ve made for myself are keeping me going because there were many, many times when I, my choice could have been to give up. And the lesson learned was to keep on going, cuz there’s a lot more work to do. So the opportunities that were presented for me and the support really kept me going.
Casey J. Cornelius (06:22):
The, the thing, the, the word you just used, there was choice mm-hmm <affirmative>. And I know that you and I have talked about this several times, bring people into this, you know, we talk a lot about resiliency and mm-hmm <affirmative> and, and bouncing back and so forth. But those really do come down to in many ways, a series of choices, right? Like we, we know people who their resiliency ends when the bus route changes or, you know that running, running less gas money. Exactly. Mm-hmm <affirmative> exactly. But, but yours is, is really a journey of choosing every day to be resilient with some really, really tough challenges. Like where, where does that come from?
Mindy Sopher (07:06):
Hmm. I give a lot of credit to my grandmother who instilled the basic values of living for others. She’s the one that took me to church and we studied did Bible study and things like that together. And my church family was really important to me in my formative years, but the values of giving to others to help fulfill our own destiny and not instead not being about me, it’s not about me. I’ve had many, many opportunities where students have come up and said, my mom was just diagnosed with breast cancer or my dad has whatever kind of cancer or my aunt, what can I do? What can I do to support them? How can I help them? What I feel helpless, what can I do? So there was an opportunity for me to do some teaching and coaching and loving on those folks who were just feeling lost.
Mindy Sopher (08:10):
I would not have really had before to the point where, you know, I’ve been asked to speak on that topic a lot locally, and I made up a, a tip sheet, right? What can I do top 10 things that they don’t tell you when you get cancer for people to be aware of who are co survivors in cancer, in the cancer journey? What I, what I also decided was that cancer doesn’t define me. I’m not dying from cancer, I’m living with cancer. And that is a real choice waking up every day, too. Right? The, yeah, the only time that I really couldn’t deny it, like I can skip along through the daisies and see the bright side and have the glass half full and all those kinds of things. That’s just the way I am. My grandmother exemplified that for me. But in the radiation room, when they close that big lead door and I’m laying naked on the metal table and they’re shooting radiation things into my nude body, that’s laying there freezing and holding my breath. I, I could not deny that I had cancer. And what I did during those most alone times were just be one with God and pray to what I see God to be. And I got comfort and strength and got up, threw my clothes back on and went back to work. That’s it.
Casey J. Cornelius (09:36):
I, I hope you don’t mind me saying Mindy on behalf of everybody, who’s listening to everybody who’s ever known you. You’re, you’re, you’re a badass <laugh>
Mindy Sopher (09:44):
I’m really blessed, man. I am so lucky and I am really blessed.
Casey J. Cornelius (09:49):
I wanna, I wanna share something, having known you these all these years. Mm-Hmm <affirmative> although, you know, we’re, we’re still both very young. There
Mindy Sopher (09:57):
You go. Relative.
Casey J. Cornelius (09:59):
Yeah. Right. there’s something that you do, speaking of consistency that I find just, just so awesome. Whenever you meet someone new mm-hmm <affirmative> you always ask them this question and, and by the way, yes, I do. For, for those of you who know Mindy, she asked you this question too. You always say, tell me your story.
Mindy Sopher (10:20):
Mm-Hmm <affirmative> yes. I do. Tell me
Casey J. Cornelius (10:22):
A little bit about how, how that habit started and, and maybe what you’ve gleaned from, from throwing, lobbying that question to hundreds and thousands of people over the years,
Mindy Sopher (10:34):
A lot of people dunno what to say and that’s okay. That’s okay. I give them that space, but there was a wise person in my history that’s did that to me. And it really made me think that said that to me, and I felt listened to and cared about. So because of that impact on me and because after we were done, they said, wow, I really learned a lot. Thank you for sharing. I felt appreciated. I’ve tried to model that and I have met some amazing people that you’ve never heard of that have impacted my life significantly. A few that you might have heard of before, but that’s not, what’s important. It’s the story. It’s not the name or the fame. So I continue that mission or that practice in my classes. I don’t let my students sit in the same seat every day. I make a mix up beside other people because the value that they can find, if they take advantage of sitting with talking, to getting to know the story of other people, not only make some better humans themselves, from what they learn, they get to be better listeners, better critical thinkers, and they can move forward in collaboration as opposed to isolation. So I’m communicator, right? That’s really critical. Well,
Casey J. Cornelius (12:01):
What’s interesting is I, Mindy, I think a lot of people who think of communication think that it like sentences end in periods, but you end a lot of sentences with question marks.
Mindy Sopher (12:10):
Absolutely. Keep it open, keep it growing. When I go to a conference, I sit with people I don’t know, because I wanna hear their story and I wanna grow from learning from them. Another thing my grandmother often quoted it. People don’t care how much, you know, until they know how much you care. So it really doesn’t matter if I have a PhD or I cured cancer. It matters that I care about them as a human. And I think that makes the world a better place. And I think that makes me better able to serve listening is what I’ve times the communication skill that speaking is. And I’m a better speaker when I’m on a campus. When I listen to what the needs of the students are and of the administration is, and what is going on there. And I think I’m a better speaker because of that. I’m also whenever,
Casey J. Cornelius (13:10):
Whenever we do these recordings there’s always a moment that, that I, I sense is going to be made into the the audio clip. You know, when, when we, when we share the the episode future I, I think we might have just had it for those of you, for those of you who don’t yet know Mindy Sofer, by the way, where have you been? But, but if you don’t yet, please make sure you check out not only her, her bio, but also her signature programs at, for college, for life.com/mindy super important work that she does. Mindy. I want to ask you a little bit about those as well. You know, you, you talk about relevancy the relevancy of sorority and fraternity, and, and I, this is for someone who cares about fraternity, the way that, that you and I do. I’m, I’m asking this question I guess with a, with a hope for what your answer is going to be have, have, have fraternities and sororities lost relevancy today. I mean, do, do we, do we still make college life better?
Mindy Sopher (14:20):
Do we, as fraternity and sorority members and fraternity and sorority organizations make college life better? I think the opportunity is always there. If the choices are ones in line with our values, where choices are made, that are not in line with our values, the opportunity to not make college life better is there, but just as studying and managing time and learning how to manage money and relationships and all those things, those are, again, all about choices, the potential for a fraternity or a sorority to make a college students life better is tremendous. And to make college life and community life better and later life after college better is unbelievable. I’ve always said that fraternity and sorority life is a microcosm of society in a great place to learn and fail in a safe environment. So as I’m learning leadership, as I’m learning service, as I’m learning integrity, as I’m learning justice, as I’m learning friendship, as I’m learning to live with other people in a group <laugh> environment and eat and pay bills and organize events, et cetera, etetera and care about people is a tremendous learning lab and a great way to challenge and support individuals in their personal professional growth when done.
Mindy Sopher (16:02):
Right. And that’s really all about choices, utilizing resources and doing, doing the right thing.
Casey J. Cornelius (16:09):
There was a little pause there you said when, when done, right. I, you know, what you just described I think is what a community is like.
Mindy Sopher (16:18):
I do agree that fraternity and sorority is a community that microcosm we done, right. Unless when, when done right. Well, it, again, it all comes down to choices. And I, I talk about that in my programs too. It’s really all about choice that I do have a choice as an individual, and I do have a choice as a group when we vote or when we act going along with everybody else. If we, after the intermural game, if we say, good, good game. So, and so that’s different in saying, screw you so and so, you know, or mm-hmm, <affirmative> let’s rumble or hate each other, whatever other immature choices can be made, you know, respecting the loss and respecting the win and respecting the good play are a lot more important. I think in the long run, again, a learning lab for later on, what if you end up the competing company with yours or the, or the neighboring township where you’re talking about zoning and things like that, collaboration, cooperation, learning to understand people who are different, great opportunity in the fraternity and sorority community to do that.
Casey J. Cornelius (17:34):
I, I wanna, I want to dig deep on, on something that I was there. So I, this quote is not only attributed to you. I, I know that you said it, cuz I was, I was in the room when you said it and, and I’ve heard a lot of people since repeat it.
Mindy Sopher (17:48):
Somebody put it on a t-shirt
Casey J. Cornelius (17:49):
Even on a t-shirt right. <Laugh> I I’m, I’m gonna paraphrase a little bit, but the, the salient message was our founders wouldn’t care necessarily that we remember their names, but that we remember their values.
Mindy Sopher (18:05):
Casey J. Cornelius (18:06):
Can you talk a little bit about that, that juxtaposition?
Mindy Sopher (18:10):
Sure. knowing the founder’s names out of respect, I get it. I support that, but their lasting legacy is that they began an organization based on specific values. And that’s really what they cared about. They got together because they believed something, they believed it together and they believed that they could do better at forwarding those messages and those values by working together. And they formed an organization so that the collaboration and the synergy around those values, whatever they are. And so many are so similar among and across our organizations leadership and respect and love and friendship and service and scholarship and integrity and justice and love when those kinds of things, which are, which are all honorable, when those come together with more people, the chance for them to grow and grow the community is even better. So I say, why, why drill, drill, drill on the names? Why not talk about and drill, drill, drill on the values.
Casey J. Cornelius (19:38):
Mindy Sopher (19:39):
Instead of, you know, reciting off who they were. I, you know, I respect Mary summer drill sparks Hendricks, and I wanna say her name right out of respect for her. And I thank her and appreciate the work that she did with the other three women to form Capella. But what they gave me that was more important to me was the concepts and a way to understand better honor beauty, not just by looks, but the true beauty in the world and, and the aspiration for achieving the highest level of what I can do. And that’s what I shoot for. Those are the values and those translate into all kinds of different things.
Casey J. Cornelius (20:26):
One of the things that always strikes me, Mindy, and I, I, I wonder your reaction to this as well is, you know, we, we think about the founders of organizations and they were remarkable, like remarkable yeah. People OVI obviously, right. To, to put something sort of into permanence. That’s, that’s still here today. Right. But you know, one of the things that, that I always say is that they were also mostly all young people.
Mindy Sopher (20:53):
Casey J. Cornelius (20:54):
And, and it kind of gives me hope. I think, you know, when, when working with college students is that, you know, sometimes we think like not, not we, you and I, but people think like, oh, they’re, they’re just students. Or they’re just young adults, whatever it is. But young adults, at one point in time set forth these organizations that have bounds, hundreds of thousands of people does, does that ever strike you as well? That like, they, they were all just sort of figuring it out in the moment too,
Mindy Sopher (21:22):
Every single day. I think about that. And that’s why I still work with fraternities and sororities as a volunteer. And that’s why I still teach college students because their brilliance and their desire to learn and figure things out is purely visible every single day, whether it comes through an email or a text or a question or an eye, you know, an eye roll in class or <laugh> on the intermural field or over lunch in the cafeteria or in an advising meeting. Yeah. And, and challenging students to continue to question, I think is very powerful. Just the pure creativity in available in youth today. You know, I think there’s a time when many humans get to a point where they feel like I already know that.
Casey J. Cornelius (22:26):
Mindy Sopher (22:27):
And one, one of my, one of my favorite things to do is challenge students to go to as many leadership schools and as many workshops, even if they could probably present the time management workshop, go again and listen for the part that you didn’t get or need to hear again, go and see it in a different light or from a different perspective. Participate, listen to the podcast, watch the video, do it again. Even if you think you could do it yourself. And I promised going at a class or a workshop or whatever, a chapter meeting going in there with the expectation to learn something new, or to hear it from a different angle or to be challenged in whatever value or thought or belief or experience you have with that particular topic is a good thing and grows the brain. It’s like exercising, right? The more you exercise, the stronger you get, or the healthier you get, the brain’s the same way
Casey J. Cornelius (23:36):
People who, who are listening to this podcast might again, who, who maybe don’t know Mindy might think that, that some of this is is a put on, or it just cuz we’re recording or anything. This is actually how Mindy thinks and lives her life. Like this is, this is not, this is not an all put on. For those of you who’ve worked with her been lucky enough to be her friend gotten to see her speak. You can attest that this is true. Mindy. I, I also know that you spend, you know, a good portion of your bandwidth on, on one of the toughest topics that for a long time, you know, maybe forever has, has been facing college organizations, teams sorority fraternity. And, and that is, that is the topic of hazing. You know, as, as we sit here today, what would you say the role of hazing is have, have we gotten, have we gotten better? Is it, is it worse than it was like, what is your, your perspective on hazing?
Mindy Sopher (24:36):
I think well thanks for asking me, first of all. And I do appreciate your understanding of my life’s values as they come out in my everyday work. Hazing, I think is almost a word which we should get rid of so that people understand it and listen more. For instance alcoholic is a similar word. We can say somebody has a problem with alcohol, but we don’t wanna call them an alcoholic.
Casey J. Cornelius (25:15):
Mindy Sopher (25:15):
Okay. So we, maybe somebody struggles or maybe drinks too much, but we don’t wanna label them because alcoholic is a bad word. Hazings a bad word. So we don’t haze. We, you know, just like alcohol, we don’t haze, but maybe we do bully a little bit or maybe we do have unrealistic expectations or maybe we’re lazy. So we’re gonna have somebody else do it because we think we can or because somebody did it to us. I think if anything kills fraternity and sorority life, it will be hazing because folks are lazy. And I think a lot of folks who do engage in that bullying or other manipulation call it what you want to, but I think it’s more easily understandable these days because hazings such a bad word and hazings against the law, but you know, if I have Bobby run an errand for me, that’s not a big deal, right.
Mindy Sopher (26:21):
Or if I, or if I encourage my family members, cuz she’s my little sister, he’s my little brother to drink from the family bottle. That’s not hazing. That’s just getting along and getting to know each other and having fun. So although those kinds of things have been proven in a court of law who wants to go through all of that time, money, energy, and emotion spent defending something like that in a court of law or on the campus or for your national or, or a larger organization. I certainly don’t and I assure you it’s a big time and energy and money suck even just to avoid that own, your own personal energy spent there. But it’s, it’s really, to me all about growing new members when one joins a religious group or the Y M C a or a club or a well like jujitsu, you, you joined the, the dojo. There’s some
Casey J. Cornelius (27:31):
There a little bit about that. I know a little bit about
Mindy Sopher (27:33):
That. Yes you do. So whatever one joins and when they join a group, there’s gotta be some kind of indoctrination and education, but it doesn’t have to be a belittling kind or any kind that might bring harm to a person instead. It’s exactly the opposite. So hazing is for lazy people who just do what was done to them and aren’t creative enough or don’t want to use their creativity, which they have enough to build a person up. Or their definition of building a person up is different than what might be deemed by the national organization, the campus or American psychological association or the individual who’s involved. Yeah. I think hazing is an issue we have to keep talking about, but I’m not sure we should still use the word hazing. I, when I talk about it, it’s because we, we shouldn’t do it because we care about people. And if we care about people, we don’t wanna do anything to hurt. ’em
Casey J. Cornelius (28:40):
I wanna, I wanna dig deep on, on, on two things that you, you referenced there. Okay. The first one is laziness. Mm-Hmm <affirmative> I, I have sat with people who, I don’t know how else to say this. Like they, they are hazing, right? Yep. And, and I, and I challenge them on, you know, why are you doing this? And I hear things like, well, it’s, it’s the best way to build team or it’s the best way to build camaraderie. It’s the best. And, and it always strikes me until you use the word Laz, it’s the perfect word. It’s also the laziest way to do those things. And, and I’m not even sure it’s necessarily effective, but we see this a lot gets mentioned as it relates to fraternity and sorority. But we see this on athletic teams and bands
Mindy Sopher (29:21):
Casey J. Cornelius (29:23):
Professional sports like is, and I know you said it, so I’m, I’m maybe I’m guessing what the answer’s gonna be, but like, is that the word? Is it just the laziest way of doing it?
Mindy Sopher (29:33):
I have other things I have to do. Right,
Casey J. Cornelius (29:36):
Mindy Sopher (29:37):
This is the way it was done to me. So that’s what I know. Mm-Hmm, you know, my mom made meatloaf this way, so that’s what I know. So it’s easier than looking it up on Google or opening up my recipe book or, you know, asking other people, that’s just the way it was done. Right. So my question is, what’s the, what’s the goal? What is your objective? Right? And then what’s the best way to do that. What’s the best way to do show me the, show, me the data and the research that says that what you did by making John do pushups and run around the block 15 times, and then go buy you cigarettes and deliver him to your girlfriend’s house. That that’s the best way to make John feel accepted in your organization. If that’s the goal. If, if you want John to be a good member, then how does that, how is that the best way to make John A. Good member? Wouldn’t, wouldn’t there be some other things that were fun, maybe not entertaining for you right. Maybe not fun for John, but might there be some other ways that are better to achieve echo and you can do it and enjoy it, but it’s not at somebody else’s expense. What if John has a test to study for, right. What if John’s not old enough to buy cigarettes and he’s breaking the law?
Mindy Sopher (31:00):
I mean, what if he gets in an accident on the way to the girlfriend’s house or his mother needs him to take her to the hospital? I, you know, I’m just thinking of things that have happened, but yeah, I think it’s lazy and we have other more important things to do. I gotta study for a test. Right. I gotta take my girlfriend out. I got a whatever. Yeah.
Casey J. Cornelius (31:23):
So the second part of this that I, that I want to ask you a, a mutual friend of ours, Jay Harris, and I once had a conversation yeah. About, yeah. I, I know about the word pledge,
Mindy Sopher (31:37):
Casey J. Cornelius (31:37):
And how it has fallen of course, out of style and out of favor, just like the word rush has, at least we’ve tried to make it fall out of style in favor. Right. But he, he made a point to me that I thought was interesting and I wanted to pose it to you in, in reference to this conversation around
Mindy Sopher (31:52):
Hazing. I respect him.
Casey J. Cornelius (31:54):
I, I do too. And the, the thing that he asked was by getting rid of the word pledge, aren’t we also getting rid of the verb, right? Like, like making a pledge to those, to those values and to those standards and so forth by removing that, are we also removing the subtle reminder that’ that it is a, a pledge. It is a, a commitment. Do you think that these things are connected in any way?
Mindy Sopher (32:22):
Yeah. Well, you said a verb. I would say a pledge is a promise. Therefore it’s a no.
Casey J. Cornelius (32:28):
Mm. You got me. Yep. Go ahead.
Mindy Sopher (32:33):
Cause if I make a promise to you, then I should uphold that promise that has to do with my integrity, my honesty, my true sincere care and respect for you. So what is that promise? And again, the goal of the education and bringing in a new member to the Y M C a is to make a good Y M C a member responsible long term, right? Not just for this two month, four month, six week, whatever period, but to make them a member for the rest of their life. That’s what you hope for. Right. And why not focus on what makes a good member, not what makes a good pledge or new member or fi or whatever they are called, right. Probate or whatever. Cause that’s a short period of time.
Casey J. Cornelius (33:33):
If you are like me listening to Mindy, talk about these really tough issues. You’ve probably gotten the chills once or twice. There’s a genuine care, right? There’s a genuine care to what she’s talking about. And I, again, I invite you to, to check out not only her, her programs, but also her messages for college, for life.com/mindy. Mindy. I’m gonna ask you a question. I, I, I’m gonna pull back the curtain a little bit before, before these interviews. I always say to folks what’s something, do you really want me to ask you? Like what, what’s a question and, and, and you threw in one that it, it jumped off the page to me. So I’m gonna ask it before we get into our, our rapid fire questions.
Mindy Sopher (34:13):
I hope I can answer it.
Casey J. Cornelius (34:14):
I hope so. Mindy, what will it say on your tombstone?
Mindy Sopher (34:20):
It’s going to be an extension cord
Casey J. Cornelius (34:24):
Mindy Sopher (34:27):
Because I think I’m in the world to connect people and to connect ideas and to connect current with future. I don’t know if it’ll have my name on it, but it’s darn well gonna be an extension cord.
Casey J. Cornelius (34:45):
Well, if I have anything to do with it, it will be an extension cord to a, to a neon sign.
Mindy Sopher (34:51):
No, no, no, no, no.
Casey J. Cornelius (34:53):
I tell ya.
Mindy Sopher (34:55):
Casey J. Cornelius (34:56):
I know. There we go. Getting the chills again. Mindy is a connector there. There’s no doubt about it. A good way that we get to connect the dots is, is asking the same questions of everyone. So Mindy, if, if you’re ready, you wanna do some rapid fire questions,
Mindy Sopher (35:11):
Do it to it. Okay. Thank you.
Casey J. Cornelius (35:14):
So this is obviously, you know, hypothetical, cuz I know your schedule, this can’t possibly be true, but let’s imagine for a second that you have an entire day to binge watch anything. What do you choose
Mindy Sopher (35:27):
Right now? It would be Bridger 10, start to finish all the way through because of fantasy because of interaction of people and because of the creativity of the writing that makes it current and past.
Casey J. Cornelius (35:42):
I, I, I, I know, I know a few folks, the Mo mostly, mostly ladies who, who enjoy Bridger tin and, and creativity seems to be the the word of the, the day as it relates to, to that to that series and also the books. So Bridger tens. Are you, are you, oh, what is the term an an Anglo file? Do you like the, the British shows?
Mindy Sopher (36:05):
Eh, some yes. Some, no, but I’ll be honest with you. That’s the only, that’s the first show that I ever binge watched. Okay. And it’s only been four shows that I’ve ever binge watched and they all started this year.
Casey J. Cornelius (36:19):
Okay. Well, I think, I think it goes back to the idea that you never have an entire entire day to, to binge to watch anything. <Laugh> all,
Mindy Sopher (36:27):
We’ll do it to you.
Casey J. Cornelius (36:29):
Right. For sure. For sure. Mindy, what is the most used app on your phone?
Mindy Sopher (36:34):
Facebook? I have a Facebook page for my class. That’s been going for about eight years, my nonprofit leadership class, which has raised over 3.5 million for agencies in the community. And we have folks that have been there since they were in class 10 years ago. And they’re hiring some of the students now that are in the class or engaging them as interns. And we really built a great community there. It’s got 800 and some people in it right now. And I’m all the time checking that adding new educational pieces to it, cheering for folks who’ve been doing good stuff and gotten new jobs and created new nonprofit agencies and made a difference in the world. That’s the one,
Casey J. Cornelius (37:20):
Speaking of being an extension cord, right. Mm-Hmm <affirmative> Mindy can, can people connect with you on Facebook also?
Mindy Sopher (37:27):
Yeah, absolutely. It’s Mindy Sopher. Okay. So first go first.
Casey J. Cornelius (37:33):
There you go. And again, if anyone can make this middle school basketball team happen, please, please let us know. Mindy, who would you most like to have dinner with?
Mindy Sopher (37:42):
My grandmother who passed away about 28 years ago, I would love to sit and ask her questions about things that I wasn’t able to when she was alive. Amazing woman.
Casey J. Cornelius (37:56):
What do you think she would say? What, what do you think she would, she would, how would, how would she react to how you’ve done along the way?
Mindy Sopher (38:06):
I think boy, you’re gonna make me cry. I think she would say the same thing my dad said to me before he passed away. He said he used to be really disappointed that there wouldn’t be any more Sophers in his line to carry on the Sopher name, which Sopher Gophers would be fun. <Laugh>
Casey J. Cornelius (38:31):
Another reason we need to get this done. Yes,
Mindy Sopher (38:34):
That’s really funny. But then he was able to be present at the Sue craft fel, distinguished service award presentation for AFA. And he looked at me and he said I don’t have to worry about my legacy at all. The sofa name is gonna go on a lot of places and I couldn’t be more proud. And so, yeah, I think my grandmother would say the same sort of thing. And I’m humbled to even think about her loving me like that.
Casey J. Cornelius (39:10):
I think I’m gonna cry a little bit too. This is, this is not fair. All right, here we go. Mindy, what do you do to wind down? Do you have any particular rituals bubble
Mindy Sopher (39:20):
Casey J. Cornelius (39:21):
<Laugh> bubble? Do you have anything that like that’s, that’s the one Mindy, listen, Mindy’s affinity for bubble baths is internationally recognized. So, so go ahead. Talk about it a little bit. Go ahead, Mindy.
Mindy Sopher (39:35):
Oh, I gotta have some kind of beverage, usually a mango dragon fruit refresher from Starbucks and bath and body works products of course. And the candle in there that smells like vanilla and lavender and lots of bubbles. And I’m a happy girl
Casey J. Cornelius (39:57):
To, to illustrate how far this goes. <Laugh> whenever so again, pull back the curtain. Sometimes we’ll do some retreats as a, as an organization, as a team. I always have to make sure that Mindy has you do the restroom with the soaking tub in it? You do well, I, I
Mindy Sopher (40:18):
Don’t, I don’t fuss and, and fume about it now. You’re very kind and gracious to allow me to have that oh,
Casey J. Cornelius (40:25):
Space. But I, I, I, I know what makes you happy and that’s important to me. That is a priority to me.
Mindy Sopher (40:31):
Casey J. Cornelius (40:32):
Final one. I final little plug here, make sure for college, for life.com/mindy, check out all of our stuff. Last one, I think you alluded to this a little bit. Mindy. How can listeners best connect with you?
Mindy Sopher (40:45):
Facebook works my email. I check all the time and I’m not averse to getting a phone call as long as you leave a message. If I don’t answer, cuz I don’t know the number I’m pretty open.
Casey J. Cornelius (40:58):
I love it. And by the way, if, if you can’t connect with Mindy, Soer listening,
Mindy Sopher (41:04):
Casey J. Cornelius (41:05):
Something is wrong. Just make sure, just make sure hearken back. Just make sure that you are ready to answer the question. Tell me your story.
Mindy Sopher (41:14):
Tell me your story. That’s right. And if I don’t answer, I’m probably in the bathtub.
Casey J. Cornelius (41:18):
<Laugh> right. With, with the dragon fruit refresher from Starbucks. That’s right. There you go. Yeah, there you go. There you go. There you go. <Laugh> Mindy, we, we could do 10 of these episodes talking about your journey on your, your, your, your wisdom, all those other kind of stuff. I, I hope that that you enjoyed today as much as I did. This
Mindy Sopher (41:38):
Has been fun. Thank you.
Casey J. Cornelius (41:40):
Good, good, good. Folks, if, if you’ve liked this episode, please make sure you do the things you’re supposed to do on podcasts and like ’em and subscribe and share and leave a comment. But then also, please, we really do, but, but please, also let us know what else you would like to hear. We’ve got some cool stuff coming up where we maybe do some, some group interviews. Maybe we’ll do some topic focused things. We’ve, we’ve got more in the pipeline because we know that folks are enjoying this and we see all the downloader reports and everything, and obviously people are listening and, and that’s, that’s just so cool from, from our perspective, but please let us know what we can do to be better as well. So Mindy, thank you so much for being here. I imagine that the music playing us out is going to start right now and with that wish you all well, look forward to our next opportunity to chat and until then be well,
Mindy Sopher (42:39):
Thanks, Casey blessings to all.